how to soften an intense personality

    6. 6. At this point, youre probably asking a few questions: All valid questions. What I Know About Anger. There might be affiliate links on some of the pages of this site, which means we could earn a small commission of anything you buy. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. If you would like to change your settings or withdraw consent at any time, the link to do so is in our privacy policy accessible from our home page.. Let's look at ways you can soften anger, without turning it against yourself or dumping it on someone else. Just be honest with yourself and with them if youre finding it too much and try moving on to topics that are less emotionally wearing. Deep empathy and sensitivity 3. Moderating how much you see someone gives you time to start missing them again and get excited about the next time youll be together. I understand that Im responsible for my emotions. You tend to be clingy with your closest relationships. Said the EEE. If you want it to work, sometimes its best to pick your battles and know when to agree to disagree. I wasnt soft. Prolonged Eye Contact- Means long lasting eye contact between partners or between potential love interest. Emotional intensity is not a pathology, states Imi Lo of Psychology Today. You have nothing to be ashamed of, anyway. Because you have put time and effort into using your brain for good, you hate it when people make instant judgements about things they do not know anything about. 9. However, as a parent, you should know that an intense child may just be a child who puts more energy into their feelings and emotions than the people around them. This can be because they are over-excitable, over-emotional, or subconsciously trying to dominate the conversation. Yes, Id be delighted to work with you and your daughter. You use strong words. Those who think you need to chill or mellow out arent your people. But right now, I'm dealing with exasperating circumstances in my life that make me boil at times. x. Hi Amie, document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); Learning Mind is a blog created by Anna LeMind, B.A., with the purpose to give you food for thought and solutions for understanding yourself and living a more meaningful life. They were so feminine. If you feel like youre starring in the latest crime drama and are stuck in a confession room rather than having a catch up with your friend or partner, then it sounds like youre dealing with someone who has an intense personality. Negative impacts for those with intense personalities include depression, being unable to cope with anxiety and sadness, and obsessive behaviors. Youve learned to accept yourself as you are and not to sweat the uninformed opinions of those whose expectations you dont meet. They developed a scale for its detection. If you are interested in personal growth, read more on our site. You're sincere and unafraid to be yourself. You speak with conviction and without fear. The fight or flight mode, the stress response in our bodies, is what gets inflammation kicked up, gets our blood pressure up and pulls the blood in our body away from our organs and away from helping our body detox (our liver) and digest our food (stomach) and focus on hormones (reproductive system) and so those systems start to shut down over time because the blood in your body rushes to your arms and legs. Most emotionally intense people are also highly intelligent and intellectually rigorous. Psychology Today: Health, Help, Happiness + Find a Therapist Find a simile or metaphor for each (e.g. Vanderbilt University in Tennessee and the Massachusetts Hospital published a study on the subject some years ago. Compared to peers your age, you are an unusually deep thinker and feeler. Nothing comes out of your mouth that you dont mean. Latest posts by Lauren Edwards-Fowle, M.Sc., B.Sc. Word choice is important to you, and you feel the nuances in every syllable you speak. Allow All Cookies. 1) You ask too many questions Because you like to understand things at a deeper level, you are naturally curious. 3. 8. Have you ever been told youre too intense? Instead of focusing your intensity on your relationships, find a positive outlet, such as volunteering, making art, or joining a cause. In a world where everyone is trying to fit in, blend in, and be liked, it can be hard being an intense person. Being highly perceptive 4. ITs something I didnt realize until I was 33 last year and a bunch of different energy workers/healers told me this. Perhaps you already suspect this, but you arent sure what it entails to be emotionally powerful. You mean what you say and say what you mean. SO harsh. For days. Maybe youre just processing something. Exploits others to achieve their goals. C. Made them feel silly with a witty and intense come-back. We and our partners use data for Personalised ads and content, ad and content measurement, audience insights and product development. You resent anyone telling you what you should or shouldnt be interested in. 6. Given this lack of emotional stability, an intense person is more likely to have sudden outbursts, find it hard to break out of a mood, and feel compelled to share and act upon their feelings even if they know it sounds irrational. And for some, your intensity can make it hard for them to feel relaxed around you. Many people with intensity issues, for example, are also creative, sensory, and sympathetic to the suffering of others. Its important to remind them that these things can often be hard to control. All Rights Reserved | Contact Us | Advertise | Privacy Policy, Conversational Narcissism: How To Deal With It And Avoid It, 10 Signs Of A One-Sided Friendship + How To Escape One. Their opinions of you dont matter. In this segment, the MakingChips team looks at the signs of bein. I have a question to ask you how do I get in contact with the types of healers that you speak about who have helped you relax, soften, and get through all of your lifestyle changes? Thank you for your note. They may feel a combination of extreme feelings, to a higher degree than other people, and often fluctuating between them quickly. This article reminds me that Ive grown over the years as well as I can continue to develop. Maybe journal. We contemplate deep questions, like Why was I born? What happens after I die? Whats the meaning of everything?. A Deep Sincerity Some people can say a lot without saying anything. These two types have a tendency to be outspoken, driven, and demanding. 5. Thank you so muchat 77 yo, I have entered the final stage of my life and am having seriously conflicting thoughts on whether (i) my lifelong introversion and low self-esteem, (ii) loyalty to my now-passed Japanese wife of 49 years (she was my first and only sexual and life partner) necessarily accompanied by a lack of experience that many people encounter along their life paths and (iii) now an intense loneliness that collectively (plus) are causing waves of angst and even self-disappointment/disapproval have diminished the worth of the overall parameters of my life. One can be intensely involved with their work, avocation or relationships but not absorbed in it at the expensive of other issues, or focused on themselves as in "needy". Unless its a goal to intimidate (which, hopefully, isnt the case), its essential to diffuse these misjudgments. An Intense Person has Emotional Depth and Passion You have always been an 'old soul'. Heres what you should know that might empower you to embrace this fundamental part of you: Aside from other factors like the food you eat (being hopped up on caffeine or sugar can definitely make you intense) or an underlying mental health condition, having an intense personality is a great blessing in disguise. There are 12 signs that indicate you have an intense personality: #1 You Speak With Conviction When an individual with an intense personality is categorically convinced that he's picked the best course of action, people who follow him unknowingly absorbs this belief and the accompanying emotional state. As you can imagine, that behavior isnt always well-received. 4. xox. As an A-type personality, uber driven, organised and ambitious person, who always excelled at anything I put my mind to, "soft" is not a word that would ever have been used (either by myself or anyone else) to describe me. All Rights Reserved. Even when those who dont understand them make hurtful assumptions. If you find yourself feeling drained or frustrated after spending time with a person, it could be that they are just too intense for you. If youd like to embrace who you are more, heres some guidance: Do you have an intense personality? You love to learn and expand your mind. These eight signs are traits common to owners of a strong personality, so if you see yourself reflected here consider yourself intense. We guide spiritual seekers undergoing an awakening to walk the path less travelled, practice inner soul work, and rediscover their interconnected True Nature in the present moment. After all, what is wrong with having a strong personality? Maybe youre around someone like that, and its just too stressful for you. You like to ask questions to get to the heart of a problem, feeling, thought, or event. On the other hand, those who are chill arent in the trade of changing this world positively. Therefore, emotional intensity has characteristics that are measurable and identifiable. I remember feeling so out of place and not like the other girls. This is so on point and resonates with me 100 percent. You may ask about kids and marriage on a first date even before the waiter brings drinks to the table. Intense, quirky people tend to attract other intense, quirky people. Its not always possible to avoid the hard topics in a romantic relationship. And if anyone asks how you feel, you dont sugarcoat it for them. I agree. You might be able to handle a conversation like this once in a while, but if this is everyday life for you, youre going to wind up resentful of the attention they are demanding from you but not giving back in return. People engaged in this type of eye contact are hard to interrupt. This is typically the lovey dovey stare you see between two people in movies. Thank you Loren! Intense people are often compelled to act on these emotions and may lose control over their common sense. While intense personalities may turn some people off, many more people want to learn to communicate with them better. Listen to your Souls calling. Ouch! They excel at interpersonal skills because of their compassion and depth of feeling. Intense is used to describe something that is very great or extreme in strength or degree. That, my friends, is a key step to healing your nervous system and your overall body. Manage Settings Intensity is all about emotion, and if you feel that someone is too intense, then youre probably uncomfortable with how emotionally open they are. And if you have an intense personality, youll probably recognize the following traits: When you meet someone willing to listen, it doesnt take long for you to open up and show your full intensity. Many of us experience anxiety in one form or another, but being an intense character makes you more prone to it than most. I was still a 10 year old girl in survival mode just trying to toss food in my mouth standing up in my apartment and doing everything to just survive while pushing so hard to get things done. While this approach may get the work . We spend hundreds of hours every month writing, editing and managing this website. Try now! Many of my colleagues and friends thought it as a done deal that I would get the job. The INFJ is one of the eight introverted Myers-Briggs personality types, making up roughly 1-2 percent of the population. While many people, including my father (who I love dearly), respond to problems by getting rough, having a knee-jerk reaction to things that happen externally and jumping into the issue, while the problem would fare better if they reacted to a certain challenge by getting quiet with themselves, accepting whats going on and reflecting whats going on. If you find yourself in any kind of relationship with someone who is bordering on obsessive, remind them to come up for air once in a while and encourage them to try something new with you. allen campbell chef salary. To heal them and to heal myself. They push, push, push to get things to work out their way or simply ignore the anxiety and stress and shut down the emotions that these reactions cause. Here are signs your personality is so deep and intense that it is intimidating to others. People with emotional intensity are sometimes. If its a friendship, try to find an activity you can concentrate on together or simply limit the time you spend with them. That said, if your intensity is making it hard to be in a relationship, here are some tips on how to balance it: Now that youve learned more about intense personality traits, how many of them resonated with you? This post may contain affiliate links. If a person has frequent and dramatic mood swings, it can be difficult to deal with. This is also why at 40 or 50 dying your hair back to your 'natural' colour may no longer suit you - your skin has lost the intensity that worked well with that natural colour you had at aged 20, your current natural colour is the colour of your hair as it grows from your head. Intense people are usually in a rush. We cogitate on thoughts for hours. Despite the beauty and benefits of your emotional expression, there may be times when you must tone it back. And when others make assumptions without knowing the facts, you feel a deep and instant outrage. 3. If youre looking for positives, it means you know what you want and dont want to waste any time. 19. She lived in Manhattan for a few years but now is in Philly. D. Sat there like a little baby and cried about it. So you assume others want the same. It dawned on me that I was so harsh. We want to help everyone and everything. If you took an extensive personality test, what are the chances that your results would be accurate to other peoples predictions about you? Regardless of your personality type, finding a good therapist is a vital tool to learn more about yourself. Someone who I would consider intense would be or do some of the following: talk non stop, not allowing others to talk. Conversely, we may feel uncomfortable making eye contact because of the intensity of our inner thoughts and emotions. Is often arrogant or haughty. cavocrol percentage. 1. this helps a lot and Im 69. I completely agree! We hope you find this article helpful! Often when someone is too intense, theyre too excitable or in the moment. We only have so much of ourselves to share around and you should surround yourself with people who bring a richness to your life, not leave you feeling drained. The intense person resents the very existence of small talk. 14. Maybe you already suspect as much, but youre not sure exactly what it means to have an emotionally intense personality. 7. We dont like having big social networks they dilute our intensity too much. but since most of us werent (myself included), thank you for pointing out the importance for us to teach to ourselves as adults. So, theres zero payoff for appeasing them. They are keenly aware of their internal world and often have a running mental dialogue with obsessive thought patterns. What Is Your True Color Personality Type? Your intensity propels you onto paths that few others dare to explore or walk. We should apply kindness to both others and ourselves. Is envious of others. 10 Tips To Help You Deal With Loss Of Independence, 14 things confident people do (but never talk about), 30 Good Excuses To Get Out Of Something (That Are Believable), 7 Reasons You Hate Socializing (+ How To Approach This Situation), 10 Reasons To Keep Going (Even When You Feel Like Giving Up), 20 Signs You Have An Endearing Personality, Copyright A Conscious Rethink. I always thought it was just me too and that I was alone and that no one else felt this way. You use descriptive language to express your thoughts and feelings with others. When you go soft you pause and sit and take time to look at the issue at hand- this is when subtleties that we often arent aware of come up for us and we have a shift in perception. Well, I felt so out of place and so awkward. Thank you! They are extra all the time, probably successful, smart, grab attention easily. So many people (including 'the old me') would react without thinking, instantly moving into the fight or flight fear mentality putting themselves into the victim mode. Make characters' eyes contrasting or incongruous. Youre all in, and youd alienate the world to have your friends back. Were die-hard romantic idealists. If someone is asking for more from a relationship than they are investing back into it emotionally, then you should take a step back from them and question what you are really getting out of it. You Are Opinionated And Convincing, But Not Arrogant You know your own mind and you aren't easily swayed by others. If youre an intense person, you probably have a small circle of people you trust and who love and accept you as you are. You enjoy deep chats. Kids have seemingly endless energy and are still learning social cues and proper social behavior. We dont realize how our past can have such a strong hold on us until we become aware of it. This post resonated with some of my qualities so much, and I never thought these would be characteristics of an intense person. It isn't unusual for an abrasive person to try and turn the tables . You cant be satisfied with pat answers or hypocrisy. However, those rules are frequently challenging to implement. Some would describe you as clingy. The way you see it, life is just better when your besties are near. Learn More 649 I used to be hard core about doing intense exercise 3-4 times a week. I believe intense personalities are all reasonable concerns determined by how our minds function and how we absorb emotions. 12. 4. But, she is also tough like u describe..I find myself often thinking that you could help her. But guess what? An intense single person will not be looking for a casual lover and will be seeking their soul mate who understands them. An intense person chooses words carefully to express their thoughts with lots of emotions. Namaste. Growing up, most of us heard adults talk about the right way to communicate and express ourselves. We pay undivided attention to each person we talk to. An emotionally intense person is one who feels so strongly and deeply they cant hold it in or hide it. If you have an intense person on the team, you can feel good knowing theyll likely pour themselves into the project on hand. Theyre not shy about expressing their thoughts and feelings, even when others dont share them or appreciate them. That is the goal, after all. Either way, too much negativity too often can be exhausting for the both of you. Or how many reminded you of someone you know and love? And your heightened senses and emotions give you the ability to respond to people, situations, and surroundings with a clarity thats unique. have strong views and try to push them onto others. And I was like.OMG. Youre fully capable of keeping yourself entertained without anyone elses attention or admiration. Emotional intensity occurs with people who feel things differently they almost absorb the emotions of the people around them, which helps them feel as if they can relate to others. Our eye contact is intense. If you feel overwhelmed by the conversations you are having, its ok, theres no need to get serious all the time and discuss topics youre uncomfortable with.

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